$0 Scotland — Parenting Plan Starter Checklist

Do You Need Mediation Before Custody Court in Scotland?

In England and Wales, you must attend a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting (MIAM) before filing most family court applications. Scotland has no equivalent requirement. There is no statutory obligation to attend mediation before applying to the Sheriff Court for a Section 11 order on child residence or contact.

That said, once proceedings start, a Sheriff can pause the case and refer you to mediation at any point. Understanding when and how this happens — and when it can't happen — matters more than whether you're technically required to try it first.

Voluntary, But Strongly Encouraged

Under Chapter 33 of the Ordinary Cause Rules, the Sheriff has wide discretion to encourage mediation in family actions. At a Child Welfare Hearing, the Sheriff can formally sist (pause) the case to give both parents time to attend mediation through accredited services like Relationships Scotland.

The 2023 Case Management Rules tightened this further. Sheriffs now expect parties to have actively considered alternatives to litigation before appearing at the Initial Case Management Hearing. Outside a Mandatory Information Meeting pilot, you won't be refused a hearing merely because you haven't tried mediation, but you may be asked to explain why you haven't.

Section 24 of the Children (Scotland) Act 2020 went further still by establishing a pilot programme for Mandatory Information Meetings. Under this pilot, parents considering a Section 11 application must attend an information session about mediation, collaborative law, and arbitration before they can proceed with litigation. The pilot is running in selected Sheriff Court districts, not Scotland-wide.

The Domestic Abuse Exception

This is critical: mediation is explicitly unsuitable — and Sheriffs will not direct parties to it — in cases involving domestic abuse, coercive control, or child protection concerns.

This exception exists because mediation assumes a roughly equal power dynamic between the parties. Where one parent has subjected the other to abuse, that assumption fails. Sitting across a table from an abusive ex-partner and being asked to "negotiate" isn't mediation — it's an extension of the control dynamic.

If you're in this situation, you should instruct a family solicitor to handle communications, apply for protective interdicts or non-harassment orders, and arrange for any child contact to take place in a suitable supervised contact centre. Statutory Care Inspectorate regulation of child contact services is due to commence fully on 1 April 2027.

What Family Mediation Actually Involves

Mediation in Scotland typically follows this structure:

Pre-mediation intake. Each parent has a separate initial meeting with the mediator. This costs around £105 per person at most Relationships Scotland centres. The mediator assesses whether mediation is appropriate — checking for power imbalances, abuse, and willingness to engage.

Joint sessions. If both parents agree to proceed, they attend joint sessions with the mediator. Sessions typically cost between £40 and £155 per hour per parent, depending on the provider and location. Most cases need 3-6 sessions to reach agreement.

The mediator doesn't decide. A mediator facilitates discussion. They don't take sides, give legal advice, or tell you what's fair. If you reach agreement, the mediator can draft a memorandum of understanding, which you then take to a solicitor to convert into a binding Minute of Agreement.

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Legal Aid for Mediation

The Scottish Legal Aid Board (SLAB) funds family mediation for parents who meet the financial eligibility criteria. If you qualify, your share of mediation costs is covered. Legal aid for mediation is separate from legal aid for court proceedings — you can qualify for one and not the other.

Check your eligibility through the SLAB eligibility calculator on their website. The income thresholds are relatively generous compared to legal aid for litigation.

Other Alternatives to Court

Mediation isn't the only option between "sort it ourselves" and "full court proceedings":

Collaborative law. Each parent instructs a collaboratively trained solicitor. All four sit down together and negotiate. If negotiations fail, both solicitors must withdraw and you start fresh with new lawyers for court — which creates a strong incentive for everyone to reach agreement.

Arbitration. A qualified family arbitrator makes a binding decision after hearing both sides. Faster and more private than court, but both parties must agree to use it.

Parenting programmes. Relationships Scotland runs "Parenting Apart" sessions, and Shared Parenting Scotland offers the "New Ways for Families" programme. These aren't dispute resolution — they're skills training that helps parents separate their personal conflict from co-parenting decisions.

For a step-by-step guide to the full range of resolution options and how to prepare for each one, see the Scotland Child Custody & Parenting Plan Guide.

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