How to Respond to Divorce Papers

Being served with divorce papers is disorienting, but the clock is already running. In most US states, you have 20 to 30 days from the date of service to file a written response with the court. Miss that window and the court can proceed without your input — granting terms you never agreed to.

Here is what you need to do, and in what order.

Read Everything Before You React

The papers you received typically include a Petition (or Complaint) for Dissolution outlining what your spouse is requesting, a Summons telling you how long you have to respond, and possibly a proposed Settlement Agreement, Parenting Plan, or Financial Declaration.

Read the petition carefully. It contains your spouse's version of what they want: how property should be divided, who should have custody, whether they are requesting support. If you agree with everything, your response is simple. If you disagree with any term, your response needs to address the specific points of contention.

Know Your Deadline

Response deadlines vary by state. Most fall between 20 and 30 days from the date you were served. California gives 30 days. Texas gives 20. New York gives 20 for personal service, 30 for other methods. Florida gives 20 days.

In Canada, the response period is typically 30 days for domestic service. In the UK, 14 days to acknowledge receipt through the online portal. In Australia, 28 days domestically.

The deadline is calculated from the date of service — not the date the petition was filed. If you were served on July 10 in a state with a 30-day window, your response is due by August 9.

If you need more time, you can file a Motion for Extension of Time before the deadline expires. Courts usually grant a first extension of 30 additional days as a matter of course, but you must file the motion before the original deadline passes.

Your Three Options

Option 1: File an Answer agreeing to everything. If you agree with all the terms in the petition, file an Answer (sometimes called a Response or Appearance) stating that you accept the proposed terms. In many states, you can also sign an Agreement or Stipulation confirming the settlement terms. This puts the case on the uncontested track, which is faster and requires no hearing in most jurisdictions.

Option 2: File an Answer contesting specific terms. If you agree with some terms but disagree with others — say, the custody schedule or how a retirement account is divided — your Answer should admit the facts you accept and deny or contest the ones you do not. You can also file a Counterclaim (or Cross-Petition) proposing your own terms. This does not automatically make the case hostile; it sets the stage for negotiation or mediation.

Option 3: Do nothing (default). If you do not file any response by the deadline, the petitioner can request a default judgment. The court will typically grant the divorce on the terms outlined in the original petition — your spouse's terms, not yours. You lose your right to contest property division, custody, and support.

Default is almost never in your interest. Even if you agree with the terms, filing a response protects your ability to be heard if issues arise later.

What Your Response Should Include

Most states have a standard Answer or Response form available from the court's self-help website. It generally covers your position on each allegation in the petition (admit, deny, or lack knowledge), any counterclaims or alternative terms you propose, and your own financial disclosure if the state requires one at the response stage.

File the original with the court and serve a copy on your spouse (or their attorney) using a valid service method. Keep a copy for yourself with the date-stamped filing receipt.

Filing Fees for the Response

Responding to a divorce petition usually requires its own filing fee, typically $100 to $350 depending on the state. If you cannot afford it, you can file a fee waiver application just like the petitioner can.

Some states waive the response filing fee if the petitioner already paid the full filing fee and the case is uncontested. Check your local court's fee schedule.

What Happens After You Respond

If both parties agree on the terms, the case proceeds as uncontested. The court reviews the settlement agreement, parenting plan, and financial disclosures. Many states finalize uncontested divorces through paper review — no hearing required.

If there are contested issues, the court typically orders mediation before scheduling a trial. Mediation resolves the majority of contested family law disputes without a courtroom hearing.

The DIY Divorce Without a Lawyer Guide covers both sides of the process — filing a petition and responding to one — with worksheets that help you organize your financial data, compare proposed terms against your own numbers, and track response deadlines so nothing slips.